


Looking For You

by nachtmaredoll



Series: An Expression of the Heart [2]
Category: Compilation of Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy VII Remake (Video Game 2020)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Time Travel, Character Death, M/M, Planet Scar Syndrome | Geostigma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-21
Updated: 2020-12-22
Packaged: 2021-03-11 01:54:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 7
Words: 6,121
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28207158
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nachtmaredoll/pseuds/nachtmaredoll
Summary: Andrea wakes up back in his beloved Honeybee Inn, years before he ever met the taciturn mako-eyed merc, but he chose this and it is so much sweeter than eternal slumber.
Relationships: Andrea Rhodea/Cloud Strife
Series: An Expression of the Heart [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2065266
Comments: 18
Kudos: 16





	1. Afraid to Sleep

**Author's Note:**

> CW: Character death (again)  
> Also, another look on the day of Andrea’s death from Geostigma.

It had been so long since he had last thought of sleeping, of not fearing it, and so it took some time to listen to that soothing voice that kept trying to talk him under. Falling asleep was also hindered by the pain in his throat and lungs as the Geostigma kept rushing through his blood and ravaged at his already damaged lungs. 

Everything hurt, everything ached and throbbed. He wasn’t fully sure if he could recall a time where he _didn’t_ hurt. Or even how long he had _been_ hurting. A year? Maybe two? It was not like the voice had said, that he was giving up without any fight at all, because he had fought. Fought it as the muscle in his thigh began to pull, seize up on him and then finally began to fully paralyze and eventually start to rot. He lost feeling in his lower back next, and that was followed by the creeping blackness showing on his neck and upwards over his jaw and cheeks. The first time his chest had seized, and his throat had closed on him, he had panicked and blacked out from lack of oxygen and sheer terror.

After that, Geostigma was revealed to be a widespread disease attacking young and old alike. The Planet’s Curse is what some took calling it. He didn’t exactly know if he agreed with that though. At least he hadn’t until more information came out explaining mako and the Lifestream, and then he had finally conceded that yes he could see the Planet being angry and taking her revenge.

Life was cruel enough that innocents like children suffered the cruel punishments of adults, though.

For months Geostigma ravaged and raged throughout the world, not just the smoldering shell of Midgar or Edge. In months he went from being in perfect form to being trapped in bed as his muscles were ripped apart and tendons were shredded to nothing. The onslaught seemed to find every inch of him that he’d once prided himself on.

He had sent Jules away, as the tar began to fill his lungs and inch into his heart, and the voice returned. The one that spoke to him in his moments of forced sleep, reminding him he had to breathe. He feared to sleep though. Feared not waking up; despite the pain, he wasn’t yet ready to die. 

But the voice sounded familiar and spoke of Cloud. Promises that Cloud would be on the other side of only he allowed himself to sleep.

It was _hard._ To sleep would be to go gently into that good night. To sleep now would mean death. He knew he was dying. Knew that he wouldn’t last much longer but… it was still too soon. It felt too soon. 

* * *

Andrea felt his mind drifting as he watched the darkness outside his window, his mind drifting in and out as he thought over this night two years ago. Thought of mako fueled eyes. 

* * *

* * *

I’m afraid to sleep. 

_I know. But I promise you’ll see him again soon._


	2. To Wake Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Andrea wakes up back in his room in his beloved Honeybee Inn, a bit lost and confused but with echoing words pulling him out to the church in Sector 5.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CW: Language

_Come find me when you wake up, Andrea._

Where?

_The Church, silly._

* * *

* * *

Andrea groaned as he rolled over in bed, still far too tired to actually wake up. He didn’t _want_ to wake up anyways. His muscles ached like he’d just run a marathon and he had a migraine like no other he’d ever had before. Far worse than any hangover he’d ever had, on those nights when he had to drink—and keep drinking—with clients. He felt absolutely, positively _wretched.  
_

_Andrea! Wake UP!_

The loud voice echoed on static in his head and made him startle, sitting up and cringing at the far too fast movements. Everything swam and his stomach rolled. 

Staying still, he sighed and ran a hand over his closely shaven scalp and lightly rubbed at his temples. There was a phantom ache in his thigh and throat, including down low in his back. Almost like he’d pulled muscles from overworking but he could recall actually having done such a thing. In fact, he hadn’t done anything so incredibly stupid or juvenile in almost three years, when he was stressed and worried over the Sector 7 Plate crash… ing…

Andrea blinked, slowly, as he went back over his thoughts and began to take stock in himself and in the room around him. He hadn’t noticed it upon first waking up, but he was back in his plush bed in the Honeybee Inn. Things felt… _odd._ Something was _itching_ at him. 

Frowning, he tried to process his dream—was it a dream? He had memories of meeting a young blonde with beautifully stunning mako colored eyes, and of trying to impress him. Memories of worry, stress and… _jealousy._

 _Honey, I’m in_ **_love._ **

Had he really said such a thing? Out loud? Had he meant it?—the feeling rushing up into his chest and throat told him he had. He could feel his face flushing in the flood of emotion and hormones. He wasn’t one to fall subject to hormones often, and even less suited to him was emotions. These were things that he could ill afford to follow. To follow such things meant weaknesses and terribly insane levels of pure, unadulterated foolishness. 

Resting a hand on his bare abs, he shifted and rubbed hesitatingly at the butterfly sensation that bubbled up at the faint memory of holding the young merc securely, and safely in his arms as he dipped the younger man and whispered _“perfection”_ in a husky and lust filled tremor. He hadn’t even fucked the young man and he was falling all over himself due to a—admittedly graceful—run in the Don’s Coliseum and one very short dance; two minutes. Two minutes of dancing with the merc and his heart had been pounding as if he'd danced a full show non-stop. 

Had it all been a dream? Thinking of the young man now, he could hear the humming moan sound that he had made when the reveal had shown the younger’s pure beauty. Beauty has always been like art to him. 

He’d let the man go, wishing him well and safe—had sent Leslie after them with their gear so they’d have a shot at unseating the Don. Then, all too suddenly, there had been the sounds of distant gunfire and the Sector 7 plate had come crashing down. It was… catastrophic. 

Just a few short hours later, he’d once again run into the beautifully handsome man at Jules’ gym. He’d shown off a bit, flirted as they talked by arching his back as he worked his pull-ups, added an extra moan…

He was _pathetic._ What in Gaia’s name did he think he was _doing?!_

He’d never before—not once—become enamored with a client or a passing fuck. And this… 

… scrawny—lithe;

… little twig—slim;

… nameless merc—his name is _Cloud_ ;

 _No!_ No. 

Just a few touches on stage in a dance… ok so he could follow Andrea’s lead…

Andrea shook his head, clearing away the thoughts and the feelings welling up in his chest. It was all too detailed to be a simple dream… and since _when_ had he started dreaming at all? He had never been one to actually dream. Even as a young child it wasn’t something he experienced. 

Swallowing, Andrea licked his dry lips and slowly moved himself to get out of bed. 

Softly spoken words were echoing in his mind, tugging at him to get up and to get dressed. He thought the voice was familiar, but he couldn’t truly be sure. Either way, he needed to know if this was all one insanely detailed dream or if he was remembering something akin to a past life. He actually hoped he would find answers—not a feeling he was used to entertaining. 

* * *

Andrea was not normally one to dress down, but considering he was trying to sneak out of Wall Market without being seen or tracked, he had opted for a pair of old worn jeans, a more scruffy pair of his boots, a t-shirt and an overly large hoodie—something he _thinks_ he stole from Jules? Whatever the source, he made sure to keep the hood up and put his phone and keys into his pocket before slipping out of his room and then out of the Inn. 

It took him a few minutes to figure out the direction of the old Church located in the Sector 5 slums, but after asking a few people, he managed and started on the walk towards the forgotten building. He had never visited the place, but it had been standing far longer than he’d been living and everyone knew of the relic. Not that many people visited the space, but they still _knew_.

* * *

Whatever Andrea had been expecting, it was not to see a far younger Aerith tending to real lilies and smiling up at him. 

“You made it.” Her voice clocked in his memory, pulling at the echoing voice that guided him into sleep and death… guided him back and here. “I was wondering when you’d get here. Time is… not constant.”

He knew he was staring, curious and wary of this too young girl to be the young woman from his memories—his dreams? 

“Hehe… seeing you flustered is so strange.” He blinked and focused back on Aerith.tried to make sense of the morning, of the feeling of hanging upside down with nothing beneath him to catch if he fell. “I’m glad you came, you know? Though, _he_ isn’t here yet.”

“Who?” He shifted, his heart beating so fast in his chest from the odd moment driving his anxiety up and through the roof. 

“Cloud, of course.” Hearing the name was like a cold bucket of water being thrown over him. He could feel his stomach dropping out as butterflies flickered up and through his body. “He’s running late… some things came up that he must deal with first. I knew it would take time but… he won’t be back for… _two?_... more years? Perhaps three.”

He wanted to scream, to turn around and walk away. Go back to denial of feeling anything for the pretty blonde merc… refuse and push away the nonsense of his own thoughts and feelings towards the taciturn merc. The too sweet and oh-so-shy ex-SOLDIER. 

“You could leave, if you wanted… but you’ll cease to exist.” Aerith spoke quietly, sadly. Her gaze finally moving from the flowers she was tending and up towards Andrea, her own mako green eyes catching his green-gray ones. There was sadness in her gaze, tiredness through her smile, and yet it was still real and sincere. “You asked to go back, and you have been granted it. The Ancients and Gaia herself want one _last_ try. You must decide now if you want the path offered, or to go back to sleep.” 

_Sleep is death._ Those had been his thoughts, not his only thoughts but by far the loudest, in those last days and hours as he began the final descent into death from Geostigma. 

“Something connected you to Cloud that night… I don’t know what, but… you gave some type of boost to him. To his ability to face it all… a lot happened twice. It… I watched it, watched him stand stronger and taller the second time around. Every time I feared he would falter, or he thought he would break… he’d pull out your earrings and…” Aerith hummed as she trailed off and stood to face him. “I never heard what he would mutter to himself, but he would always get this second wind.”

**_Don’t ever be afraid, Cloud._ **

Andrea swallowed and licked his suddenly dry lips. It wasn’t… possible, was it? That Cloud had kept such trinkets? 

“Will you give it a chance?” Aerith questioned, her head tilted and her hands behind her back as she looked up at him. “Please?”

He thought it over, thought over the possibility of seeing the younger man again. Contemplated the alternatives, the apparent way that at least two lifetimes had occurred for this strange girl and his favorite merc. As he closed his eyes, he could smell Cloud’s cologne, see his mako colored eyes, feel his skin under his fingertips and the sheer passion they had shared on stage together.

“... Very well.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh Andrea, you pretty, silly thing. Denial doesn’t suit you, honey. Hehe.
> 
> Note: did anyone else notice little Betty dancing to “Stand Up”? It is the cutest little thing ever and I died from the cuteness overload. Also, apparently it’s hers and Marlene’s favorite song and they dance to it. ~ Honey, I’m in *love*.
> 
> Note 2: did anyone notice the way Andrea adds an extra arch in his back as you talk to him in Jules’ gym? Or the way he moans/groans in an extra unneeded way? Or the way he just shows off the whole time?


	3. Three Years

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Andrea has three years to wait for Cloud. It’s doable. He has patience. He can wait.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW/CW: More language being used, as well as more discussion on the brothel side of the Honeybee Inn, including more talk on the lack of self-ownership, some derogatory self-talk, and the mild discussion of prostitution. 
> 
> Also: Again, this is *not* underage. The allure/attraction between these two is tied to their memories of a previous lifetime and the dance. 
> 
> But, please take care of yourself first and read with caution.

Three years; he has to wait three years before Aerith can pull Cloud back to them both. He’s not entirely sure he can wait. Despite all his slowly built up patience, his perfectly sculpted and refined facade of cold indifference that has kept him calm and collected throughout his life. First as a child with a bad temper that could street brawl one second and the next dance his heart out, to a teen that learnt hard and fast to grow the fuck up and finally into a young adult and then into full adulthood. Wall Market was cruel like that. Chew you up and spit you out if you didn’t learn fast; you had to find your skills, your assets, and go.

It hadn’t been his first plan, to slip into Wall Market and sell his body to make sure he and Jules had food and a steady place to live. But it also hadn’t been his, or anyone else’s choice that once lived in Sector 6 for part of the plate to crash and take out nearly all areas but for the pleasure district. Even a few decades later, there were still rumors and deeply seeded beliefs that it had been intentional on Shinra’s part to snub out the entire slum. Miscalculations must have occurred, of course. 

When he first heard the sound of crashing, he’d rushed out on a client and towards the main stretch of the seedy little place he called home, and had been just in time to hear the deafening screams as the entire Sector 7 plate crashed. Heard the words from the Shinra helicopters blaming Avalanche. But, he’d ignored the propaganda and sought out Jules. Jules was horrified at the spectacle, of course, but not in the way that Andrea had been. Jules had been too little to remember living anywhere  _ but _ Wall Market. 

And yet? All of that paled in comparison to the sheer ripping at his heart that he was currently suffering over having to wait three long years to even be able to see Cloud once more. Even then, Aerith had no guarantee that Andrea would actually properly meet the younger man. Not when Cloud would still be fourteen years old: underage, jailbait, innocent… untouchable. Also not allowed near the Honeybee Inn by unspoken regulations stated by the other residents in Wall Market—and his own rule setting. Another large factor that he would be facing in his delay of meeting the beautiful man was that he always joined up with Shinra and the infantry had very strict rules. 

It wasn’t as if Andrea sought to throw away his moral compass—what little of it there was—he was just so…  _ impatient.  _ Cloud had done so very little and yet Andrea couldn’t get the boy out of his mind. There was intrigue, mystery, grace and beauty… lust, pure desire and a rush that Andrea had never felt before meeting Cloud, and hadn’t met in the short years afterwards. 

He had several moments, in those early weeks, where he contemplated giving up. Days where he thought of simply leaving the Inn and dragging Jules away from Midgar with him. Debts and ownership be damned. In the end, he had stayed. There was no other real option he could follow. Aerith refused to tell him Cloud’s location, so he didn’t jeopardize anything, and they stopped talking after his first month had passed. After that, he was on his own, and to be perfectly honest? He preferred it that way. 

So, instead of focusing on missing Cloud—again—he channeled his restless energy into building up the Inn to be bigger and better than it was before. He decided to jack up his own prices as close to being sky high that he could get away with, opened services to a few outside donors and members, and began to seek out investors. 

He decided—he had to—that he would be ready to give Cloud anything he would need the very second they met again.

* * *

The “very second” he met Cloud again, he hadn’t even realized it. He was hurt, from his own stupidity, and too irate to actually  _ look _ at the young teenager that stood unwarranted in his show hall during a practice run with full lighting for an upcoming show. He was adding a new number, and had two new girls to train, so he was stressed and not at all in his right mind. 

When he  _ did _ finally register who the small framed teenager in front of him was, he had collapsed in pain and Cloud had spent the last several hours sitting at his bedside while he slept and rested. 

It was bittersweet to see the younger man again, a veritable and verifiable  _ child _ . In seven years, Cloud would be twenty-one again and he would be thirty-five, a period of time where ages simply wouldn’t matter. But at present? Cloud was out of reach, and yet so very mature and so very caring. 

The way he tucked himself into Andrea’s side was going to kill him though. But after three long years, it was oh  _ so sweet _ to see him again. Even with the teenager acting like his own personal minder. Technically—according to Jules and Syd—Cloud was his self-proclaimed babysitter; a title that Andrea refused to acknowledge as being accurate but Jules loved to hold over his head whenever they spoke. Even over texts and emails, when they couldn’t speak on the phone or spend time together in-person, Jules would tease and taunt him. 

As Cloud took to assisting him with his bookkeeping, his production planning, clientele lists, and being a perfect little delivery boy, Andrea was able to see more of the blonde’s soul. Could fall more into the personality and not just the looks. The feelings of fondness settled more securely into his heart and soul, tearing and ripping at him on the nights where Cloud didn’t sleep over and he entertained his high rolling clients. 

He couldn’t not see the higher clientele. Or even the lower priced ones, the ones with loyalty cards from years and years of patronage from before he changed his prices. The money was going towards anonymous donations to Leaf House, to protecting Leslie and Merle, and to a savings—kept by Jules—to pay off his debts and buy himself out of Don Corneo’s control. 

Andrea tried to shelter Cloud from the brothel side of things, giving vague answers to any questions that drifted towards the private rooms, the forbidden area past the red light double doors, or his three years out waiting list. All things Andrea didn’t want to tarnish Cloud’s mind with, and things Andrea would rather not contemplate. He was a dancer, first and foremost. Anything else was lesser. 

And some days, when his stress hit record heights, Cloud would appear with homemade food, make him sit and eat, then would force him to lay out and would slowly massage out any knots or kinks in Andrea’s muscles. 

The days he enjoyed the most were the ones where Cloud would sit curled into his side, or very close by as Andrea sat on his bed and worked out choreography and costumes. Cloud would join him, silently reading a book and using a protected cut-out magazine picture of Andrea as a bookmark. He didn’t ask after it, but it did make him wonder the purpose of such a thing. He wasn’t even really smiling in the picture, instead a cold and dark look was in his eyes speaking of his temper. In short: it wasn’t very flattering. But Cloud kept it all the same. 

Besides, Andrea only really had to wait three years for Cloud to be eighteen and legal. It was only three years.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Andrea is a sap. And really should probably hate the number three.


	4. Red Light Regret

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Andrea’s temper and thoughts after the Shinra Elite Event.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Coincides directly with “Don’t Be Afraid”, chapter ten: The Safety In (and Hatred of) Red.
> 
> CW/TW: More foul language. Frank/blunt discussion of sex, rough sex, mistreatment of sex workers, self-hatred and shame. 
> 
> But also: a bit of rising self-awareness, temper finally snapping, some unconditional love, and protective friends.

Andrea didn’t usually strike people from his clientele list, especially not when they were high rollers, or more importantly: treated him more than half right, instead of as a mere fuck toy. And yet, Reno had pissed him off and he’d banned the man from ever touching, speaking or being near Andrea or the Inn ever again. A part of him, the logical part, knew that Reno hadn’t meant anything by what he had said and the man had already apologized. Verbally when Andrea had kicked him out of his brothel suite, and then by sending gifts to Andrea’s private rooms throughout the day and night. 

It had been… mortifying, when Reno had asked who the pretty little thing in the black and red dress spying at the door had been. He’d admittedly been a little too fried to coherently register what Reno was saying, but as he continued to describe the dress and then the mention of the cane visible from the soft lights, Andrea had suddenly and _violently_ knew exactly whom Reno had seen. The horrifying realization had also come just as Reno fucked his prostate harder and finally released his cock from the trapped confines of the cock ring he’d been bid to wear all night, allowing him to cum and he’d come hard with his throat ripping on a loud scream; the noise had been equal parts pain, hatred and torn apart pleasure. The worst part? Andrea knew that Cloud had heard the noise because his now paranoid hearing could pick up the soft clicking of the door as it shut closed behind the teenager. 

It… hadn’t been his best moment on keeping his temper, but at the same time, his nerves and tolerance had been pushed past his breaking points. He’d had to deal with Heidegger throughout the earlier hours of the night, and while he had been thankful for Genesis and Sephiroth losing their tempers, it had involved a trade off easing Heidegger’s temper at the two—mostly Genesis for breaking his arm—and Angeal had stood in the front room of Andrea’s brothel suite as his bedroom doors had remained open so the honor bound SOLDIER could chaperone the hours of fucking Andrea delt with. It wasn’t even that Andrea didn’t like sex, because he did. And it wasn’t exactly a feeling of shame—Sephiroth routinely insisted he was lying to himself—but he simply _hated_ Heidegger.

And so, when Reno said a bit too much, Andrea’s temper had snapped and he’d told the man to get out. Without Rude around to contain his wild companion, Reno hadn’t immediately realized he’d fucked up, but from all the gifts and emailed—voicemail too—apologies, Andrea was sure that either Rude or Tseng had lectured the dumbass. When Andrea calmed, whenever that would be, perhaps he would rethink his banishment of the red head. Maybe. 

* * *

Andrea had nearly crawled and dragged his tattered body up from the depths of the brothel, calling out for Syd to help him into a bath and scalding shower before Cloud would return. 

He barely made it back into bed when the door had opened and Cloud and slipped inside, still dolled up in the gorgeous black and red dress, took one look at Andrea and had rushed to his side. Wide blue eyes had scanned over the bruise at his throat, the one on his arm and skimmed—avoided—the hickeys and love bites adorning his skin. He had sat, waiting anxiously with baited breath for Cloud to speak up about seeing him with Reno, but it had never come. Cloud had simply moved to take off the heeled boots, the headband and then stripped and changed out of the dress into comfortable clothing before climbing back to Andrea’s side and tending to his overworked muscles. 

Cloud’s eyes were harder, a little duller, but there had been no look of disgust over his features, and when no words or even the hint of a tone in his voice, Andrea had finally allowed himself to relax. Cloud’s careful tending to him, mostly consisting of tending to the bruising and marks, as well as massaging his pulled muscles left Andrea a further whimpering mess. Stifling inappropriate moans and pathetic whimpers as his nerve endings screamed in pain from over stimulation, mixed with a burning—ok he’ll admit it—shame. He had thought Cloud’s possible disgust and judgement of him would be what undid him, instead what was ripping apart his heart was the protective caring and gentle touches the teenager graced him with. 

And, even more damning, was the way Cloud tucked into his side—with two layers of blankets between them—and fell asleep with his head resting over Andrea’s pec and a hand over his heart. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This series started fluffy, I *swear* it. I’m not entirely sure how it got here. 
> 
> There *may* be a thirteenth “interlude/intermission” chapter to DBA, that will bridge into the fourth part of this. And yes, there is a fourth part. We’re not done yet.
> 
> PS. Take care lovelies.


	5. Golden Light and Blue Eyes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Andrea realizes that he’s finally close to paying off his debts, even as he dreads August and what it brings in with it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CW/TW: More light discussions of the brothel side of the Inn, but a look-up and turnaround. Of inner thoughts as well as the business. 
> 
> Mostly fluffy fluffiness.

Andrea isn’t sure just when a daybed was added to his rooms for Cloud and he’s not sure when the armoire, holding creations of Jules’ in both dresses and not that his younger brother had made and tailored for Cloud, had been added. He’s also uncertain just where the summer has gone to when he suddenly finds himself looking at a calendar that tells him it is now August. He would much rather the month could either never come or skip this year. He knew that as soon as Cloud turned fifteen that he would be losing the teenager for an indeterminate amount of time. Having the younger’s phone number and being able to talk didn’t seem like it would be enough to substitute seeing Cloud, and him being in barracks meant his own bedroom would once again be his sole domain. 

That was something else that he wasn’t aware of when it had changed, when things had shifted and Cloud had somehow become a permanent fixture. It has been months now, of Cloud running around Wall Market as a merc and delivery boy. The local residents didn’t even mind his constant appearance at the Inn anymore, not after Andrea had explicitly answered questions concerning the teen’s welfare. 

Every morning that Andrea woke to Cloud being somewhere in his rooms, Andrea found himself falling more and more—and he was no longer sure if it was from memories and his crush or seeing Cloud’s personality in full. Whichever it was, he was pleasantly startled when the taciturn teen began to allow him to steal little hugs. He had seen Jules tug the boy into his side, as well as Cloud huffing and puffing, but allowing one of the girls to tug at him. Syd even spoke of Cloud’s grace and balance only improving further as the boy went through rapid fire growth spurts throughout the month of July. 

And, in seeing the end coming closer and closer, Andrea had done his math and had found—to his pleasant surprise—that he was just about able to buy himself out of his debts. To buy back his own soul and body. So, he dropped client appointments, began to change the way the Inn worked and pushed the receptionist to not actually pen-in those three-year wait appointments. He had a chance to make the Honeybee Inn legitimate—or damn near—and he couldn’t wait for it. 

In his excitement, he almost didn’t realize that he was teaching a new opener to his bees, and that it was Stand Up—that he’d asked one of his musical gifted bees to write and sing the tune. Recorded the music, created the interlude music for his dance with Cloud. But once he _had_ registered what he was doing, he had taken one last scalding shower and scrubbed off the last traces of vile and filth from his body and his mind. Stood straighter and began to plan and plot for investors. Outside of Midgar. Away from Shinra or the Don. 

The day he finalized a visit from some possible investors from Junon and Costa del Sol, he was shocked to see Jules bound in with his birthday present: his _gold earrings_. The ones that Syd had filched and placed in Cloud’s ears during his transformation on stage and had sent Andrea’s heart firmly into his throat. 

That day was the day he stripped his rooms and redecorated. Stripped down the brothel, to just a few rooms of silly nonsense and massage rooms, announced the new changes to his beloved bees… _and_ had his black and gold trimmed outfit designed and commissioned. 

He didn’t tell Cloud of the changes, or his plans, but when his beautiful blue eyes caught sight of his new earrings and flickered with _something_ Andrea couldn’t read, he’d explained they were a gift from Jules for his birthday—and then he’d been treated to Cloud gifting him a gorgeous long black trench coat with golden wing styling. 

Cloud’s eyes got brighter after that. And Andrea couldn’t help but to drown ever further in the sweet nectar that was the teen’s soft, faintly there smiles. The boy was all golden light and blue eyes—especially when that gaze would focus on Andrea when he was center stage. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aww, the fluff came back! Hi fluff!
> 
> Also: there’s two more chapters to go for this section, a two-part intermission section, and then part four will be going up.


	6. Dark Diamond Dust

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It’s Cloud’s birthday, and Andrea feels as if he was the one that was spoiled instead of his precious little merc.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think I rotted my own teeth out with this cotton candy sized fluff. Enjoy!

It was _so_ bittersweet as Andrea stepped out of his rooms past Cloud, lingering touches and a light hug over the boy as he whispered happy birthday to him and good luck at succeeding at the recruitment training to enter Shinra’s military. It still wasn’t something he liked or approved of, but Aerith had told him that this was Cloud’s path, and the boy had been training so _very_ hard with Jules to be ready for this… that Andrea couldn’t find it in his heart to ask him not to, to ask him to just stay in the slums with Miss Marle—the sweet bit gruff woman that took in him and Jules, and _when had that happened?_ —and with Andrea. 

He shook his head, despite all the nonsense rattling in his mind, and his nerves at nailing this performance to get outside investors, he was still _happy_ and excited. Cloud had been dolled up by his precious little bees in a bid to make Andrea stop stressing and he’d been walking on air from the moment that Cloud had allowed Andrea to drag the teen up topside—in the beautiful blue dress that matched his eyes—and spend ridiculously lavish amounts of money on him. Jackets for the fall weather made sense as the slums stayed warm year round due to the sun lamps and the trapped heat of the reactors along with everything else. The small little diamond studs were a surprise though, as Andrea had suggested buying them as a joke. After that, it had all been a blur. 

Cloud’s small frame had stayed at his side, his pale hand in Andrea’s as they moved through crowds of shoppers and Andrea gave tips on living topside. Not that Andrea ever had, but he’d learnt a lot in business dealings and in having been pulled up once or twice by Rude, Tseng or the three Firsts. 

It had stayed like that, in a happy bubble, until they’d nearly ran into Reno and Cloud had tensed up which had caused Andrea’s heart to cease beating in anxious worry over Cloud finally—maybe—saying something about the Shinra incident, but Reno must have seen them too and they’d both just avoided each other. He had eventually forgiven the loudmouth Turk, and Reno had looked like such a lost puppy, that Andrea had lifted the ban. Not that Andrea was selling himself anymore, and not that Reno had cared—as according to Reno, “Bout time, yo!”

Smiling, Andrea moved down through the residential floor to the main lobby and towards the show hall. He was still stressed, yes, but he was happy. In a way he hadn’t been since before death by Geostigma and before Meteorfall. 

“There’s the Andrea Rhodea that I know.” The voice, and the warmth in it, made him stop and turn from his place at the reception desk towards it and towards the sweet little vision of Aerith. She was still wearing a blue dress, but it was a bit more formal than the sundress he’d met her in three years ago. “You look good. Almost back in control?” She was still a tad bit creepy though. 

“Pretty much.” He smiled and walked the short distance between them. “Are you here to watch the show? How did you even get here this late?” 

“Hm? Oh! I bullied Rude!” Aerith’s eyes sparkled in amusement as she giggled, and he couldn’t deny how infectious it sounded. 

“Well, enjoy the show… I’ve got to go. Last checks.”

* * *

Andrea was _not_ expecting to look out into the crowd towards the front booth and see Cloud and Aerith sitting in one of the front booths and loudly clapping after the first opening number. 

He wasn’t expecting to see them still there by the second, third or fourth. With Rude next to them, more subtly clapping, but with a thumbs up as Andrea’s head tilted in question towards them. 

Cloud’s eyes might not yet be infused with mako, but they still glowed brightly in the darkness of the show hall. If he danced harder, baring more of his soul that he had—spare the dance he had with Cloud—well, it only served to show his passion. It could only add some extra promise to the investors. And, even if he didn’t get long time support from either, this night was pulling in a _lot_ of funds. 

* * *

It was still technically Cloud’s birthday when the meeting with the investors ended, and despite neither agreeing to back the Inn, the income from the night _had_ been totaled and he was officially free. 

He left the Don’s mansion with a receipt, written and stamped, even signed by witnesses that his debts were all finally paid off. 

It wasn’t until he was back in his room that he registered that one of the studs in his ear wasn’t the simple onyx as the other, but instead was one of the diamonds he’d bought for Cloud earlier in the day—and that his other onyx was missing. 

And it wasn’t until the next morning, when Syd popped up with a picture of Andrea and his bees standing with Cloud and Aerith that he realized just _where_ his onyx had ended up.

Black looked _so good_ on his little merc. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cloud’s such a little thief. 😉


	7. Saying Goodbye

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Saying goodbye hurts, but this is Cloud’s path. Doesn’t make it any easier on Andrea to watch him go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beware the feels and the sadness.

“It will be lonely without you.” 

Cloud’s head tilted at his words, his packed bags over his shoulder and watching Andrea as he huffed and fidgeted. They were both in casual clothing, Andrea dressed down and partially hiding again; Jules more open but smiling at them both all the same. 

“You have my number, Andrea.” He nodded, absently in agreement to Cloud’s words. It was a fact, he had Cloud’s number and email, and had used it liberally since they first met back in the spring. Three whole seasons had passed with the teen by his side, and yet he felt bereft and empty. The warmth of Cloud hugging him couldn’t ease his anxious shaking, nor could he hide how much he detested saying goodbye. 

He watched as Cloud hugged Jules, Aerith and Marle. It would be spring before they all got to truly see him again. He would only be topside, and yet Andrea’s heart felt like it was shattering. It didn’t even ease or soothe to see the mismatched studs in Cloud’s ears—Andrea’s onyx in one and Cloud’s diamond in the other. Andrea hadn’t put any earrings in his own ears yet, as he’d barely managed to drag himself out of bed. He hadn’t slept, a late night and then insomnia had ruined any and all chances at his being prepared for this. Especially not at four in the morning. 

“Andrea?” He snapped back into focus, looking down at Cloud’s worried eyes. “I’ll miss you, until I can see you in person again.” 

He barely managed a nod. Didn’t really register their entourage was far away from them; giving them space. 

“Are you sure this is the path you want to follow?” He hadn’t actually asked it, hadn’t wanted to hear the answers to be honest. 

“Mmhm.” 

He  _ hated  _ hearing the affirmation. 

“Andrea?” He sighed at the tug on his hoodie, and finally allowed himself to move and hug Cloud to him. “Save me a dance?”

“You have an open invitation, Cloud.” His tongue felt heavy in his mouth, like glass and cotton was stuffed down his throat as he finally let go of the blonde and watched him walk away. 

He could wait. He has patience. It’s doable. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Part 4 of this heart wrenching series should be up in a few days, as I’ll start writing it soon. 
> 
> Then Part 5 will pick back up after this and Don’t Be Afraid. 
> 
> —
> 
> I have a Twitter, tumblr, ko-fi, insta & FB and all will have updates on what I’m doing. (All links will be on profile)! 
> 
> Be careful lovelies!

**Author's Note:**

> I know this is a slightly different look at “Beautiful Perfection”, but there are reasons as this mentions one extra detail. 
> 
> PS. As I was editing this for posting, “Silent Scream” by Anna Blue played on my Pandora Radio and while not word-for-word in line, it made me cry while thinking of these two and the meanness I’m inflicting on us all.


End file.
